Fighting over politics

Fighting over politics

I recently read an article that described the decision to divorce after 22 years of marriage because the wife was a socialist and the husband voted for Donald Trump. She claims this was a revelation. She felt betrayed and undone by his support for Trump.

For her it was a revelation of how much she had changed in that past two decades and how little he had. She said she had been fooling herself all those years. She felt she had become more accepting of people and he hadn’t. He said he didn’t want to talk about politics.

How do you avoid something like this? You don’t change the view of the other. You respect them. You listen without reaction to their viewpoint and you can disagree. You respond with understanding that they deserve the right to have a position. Both positions are egoic positions; yours and your spouse’s.

Not knowing your spouse or not wanting to talk is a sure path to less intimacy.

This is the most pronounced time of positions in America I have ever witnessed. The healthiest space to come from internally is neutrality. This allows you to remain unattached. This does not mean you have no opinion or you don’t protest. This means you find inner peace and act from that space. Be honest with your authentic self. Be clear about what you believe. Allow your action to follow from that. If you are wrapped up in egoic position, you will suffer. If you are clear, honest and act from peace, you will be authentic and compassionate and act from there.

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Monday, 15 October 2018
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About the Author

My mother and father slept in separate bedrooms the last 15 years of their marriage. They really didn’t like each other; not the best role models. I made a commitment to myself that if I was to find the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with I would be prepared, educated and ready. Figuring it out as I went along wasn’t acceptable to me. 4 years of college learning about relationships followed by 2 years becoming a meditation teacher learning about myself and how we experience and understand life brought me to the point, some years ago, where I began writing about relationships. ...

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