My daughter is 13. She just told me she has a boyfriend. To my knowledge, this is her first. After working through my panic attack and contemplating whether I should quit AA I decided I needed a lot more information. Were they sleeping together? Was he from her school or from the wrong side of the tracks; ie, was he rich? Could he provide for my retirement?
My daughter is very cute. In fact she is beautiful and intelligent and kind. Getting a boyfriend was never going to be an issue for her. The issue would always be his motives. I grew up as the cheerleader who could have any guy I wanted because I was beautiful. I know the power of being beautiful. I have fallen in love with men simply because they were beautiful. It is not a good reason to be with someone. It doesn’t last and can become obsessive to maintain. For me it was a curse and a blessing.
I have matured and realize that I want the person with a soul and mind and authenticity. Yes, I need to be attracted to them but attraction to things that matter takes maturity. Notice how these blogs always end up about me?
Back to my daughter. I gave her advice. 1) Don’t sleep with him. Protection won’t become an issue then 2) Don’t give him money because we don’t have any 3) Don’t expect him to complete you 4) Don’t get him excited physically 5) Remind him you have a jealous gay father who gets out of control when his girls are hurting 6) always give 100%. That applies to relationships but not to giving blood.
Sign up to receive the best articles, expert tips and recipes from Mindfulness Green...
PLUS get your free guide to peace of mind: