Relationships: You and Your relationship are unique

Relationships: You and Your relationship are unique

Don’t compare your relationship to anybody else’s relationship. You may fight more or less than another couple. You may have more or less sex. You are unique.

 

The movies, especially romantic comedies, portray happy couples skipping, laughing and kissing all the time. Remember that’s the infatuation and it’s not the real relationship. Just because your relationship has ups and downs, highs and lows doesn’t mean it’s less than anyone else’s or it isn’t worth the time.

 

You won’t always see life the same. Men tend to be ‘mind’ centered and women tend to be ‘heart’ centered. You will want to do different things and hang out in different groups and be with different friends. Allow for that, but also find the commonalities and enjoy those together.

 

As long as fighting doesn’t become standard practice and destructive, some fights are healthy. It means you are willing do have the hard conversations, and that’s healthy. Fights can actually foster trust if you can exit a fight with love, reinforcing to the partner they can be safe and still express themselves authentically.

 

A good sexual relationship is connected to a good general relationship. While men and women seldom are on the exact desire schedule, a relationship with no or very little sex needs to be discussed openly. Talk about it. Talk about what you like and don’t like. Be open and authentic. It’s important. It might end up being a lot more fun that you thought it could.


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Thursday, 18 October 2018
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About the Author

My mother and father slept in separate bedrooms the last 15 years of their marriage. They really didn’t like each other; not the best role models. I made a commitment to myself that if I was to find the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with I would be prepared, educated and ready. Figuring it out as I went along wasn’t acceptable to me. 4 years of college learning about relationships followed by 2 years becoming a meditation teacher learning about myself and how we experience and understand life brought me to the point, some years ago, where I began writing about relationships. ...

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