Why we don’t talk about death


Our society has changed the word for the dead to deceased. It’s politically (emotionally) correct. We don’t want to look at our own death or talk about the dead. It’s important to know why.


Every culture that has ever existed has had a fear of death. And why not. No one knows for sure what will happen. Even if we have an undying faith in our religion and it’s tale of what will happen we have to realize that the religions all have different and sometimes conflicting versions. They all seem to want us to get rid of the stain of our sins before leaving or we will be in big trouble. That ranges from confusion to eternity roasting in fire. We have been pretty well conditioned to fear death.


We should have some confusion about death simply because we are ignorant of the outcome. Who likes to go somewhere you know nothing about. It could be a bummer. That’s logical.


We also probably don’t like discussing unprovable philosophical tenants with people. That’s worse than discussing politics.


We really don’t want to think about an end. Termination is always uncomfortable and feels opposed to the energetic and expanding nature of life. To be terminated is associated with being fired. Who would enjoy that?


We have also been conditioned to see death as uncontrollable. Most of us are not good at surrender and strive to control everything in our life, to our detriment I might add. So who would enjoy talking about the one thing that everyone knows is completely uncontrollable?


We have been trained that there is judgement involved. The BIG FINAL judgement that determines I am going forever somewhere really good or really bad. I hate being judged. Who wants that?


We have become really attached to our body, even if it’s falling apart. We are attached to the rest of our life too. Death rips away all these attachments. It’s like pulling off a bandaid and we all know that hurts.


And even if we didn’t have the best life, we did have some great times and saw some beautiful things, had some great experiences like sex, music and sunsets, and we experienced some great people. That’ll be over and who wants the party to end?


That’s all I’ve got. No final answer. But at least I know why I fear death. That’s a start. Maybe I don’t have to fear it and I should take a look at what conditioning, fears, habits and ways of looking at things hold me back here. They all seem to be the things that are making me not want to talk about death.

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About the Author

In 2015 a group of committed friends got together and formed Women’s Emergence with the intention of supporting conscious living, compassionate action and mindful education. In 2016 Women’s Emergence created The Mindfulness Green Cooperative as the vehicle to make that mission possible. The website MindfulnessGreen.com is intended to be a playful expression that is an inclusive, creative and fun way to promote compassionate action in the world. We serve to protect our planet, people and animals, create optimally healthy minds and bodies and live mindful and connected lives. We are a cooperat ...

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